THe nose knows

Currently reading: Drop City

Of all the things to be depressed about, this seems very trite - I wanted to update my picture for my blogs, so I took about 50 pictures of myself last night and not one was good. Not because they weren't clear or had a good composition, but because of my huge obnoxious nose that does not fit on my face. All I could see in the pictures was nose, nose and more nose. So that's it! I am getting it fixed.
Right now we are in a financial pinch, but I am determined to find a way to raise funds for this cause. I've wantred a different nose since I was about seven, and as you know, that particular feature, like our ears, only gets bigger as we age. I can't afford it, but it's got to be done.
There have been studies and field tests done on the way that attractive people get treated as apposed to the unattractive. It was found that people who have a nice face get farther in their careers, get more offers, and are generally treated better than those with not-so-pretty looks. I have a bit of social anxiety, and most of it is due to the fact that I am constantly afraid of what people are thinking of me and my uneven facial features. I ruin family and friend's pictures with my mug. One of my high school friends was mad because I made a "devil face" in her prom pictures - but i wasn't making a face, that is just the way I am! When someone has a camera, I duck and run for cover. I wouldn't want to break it.
My husband says that if we had the money for surgery, it should go to him since he has a body part that he doesn't like. He doesn't understand that the face cannot be covered by clothing, the face is the first thing people see when they meet you, the first thing on which judgement is passed. HE doesn't understand, because he has perfect facial features!! I want a new nose so that I can feel comfortable around people, and to feel less judged. Either that or we can move to a country where big noses are a sign of prestige, yeah, that'd do it!
Maybe I'm just having a PMS ramble - we'll see in a couple days. For now, if you see a tall white chick walking around town with a scarf over her face, don't be afraid- it's me!